Dear Ramadhan (Part 2)

On June 2, 2017, I published a post entitled “Dear Ramadhan“. I did not imagine revisiting it, but now, with all that is going on in the world, I feel compelled to write a “Part 2”.

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Grande Riviere, Trinidad & Tobago, December 2016 [A devastating storm at the end of 2016 wreaked havoc on the North Coast. I had already planned a trip with my girls so I went anyway… we found amazing beauty and inspiration amid the chaos.]

Dear Ramadhan,

I was so busy thinking and feeling anxious about an end to the world that I have known for so long, and an end to a way of life and living that I have grown accustomed to, that I almost didn’t see you approaching my doorstep. You will be here very soon. On-time, as usual, and I feel anxious. For the last three weeks, I have been trying to resist the urge to look at the statistics. Trying to make sense of it all. Use my time wisely. Be a good mother and wife. Find and focus on the positives. Create. Relax. Stay in touch with family and friends… and prepare mentally and physically for your arrival. With only a few days left, I have decided to look at things differently…

Whatever unpreparedness and anxiousness I feel, I am letting go and trusting that all will be well. We are living through unprecedented times and it is ok to feel out of sorts and unbalanced when our days are so predictable yet unpredictable. Ramadhan has always been the reset button, and this one will be no different. It will prepare us for what is yet to come!

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August 2017 at my cousin’s wedding rehearsal in North Carolina, USA. I am holding on to these precious memories until I can see my family again. Praying that they remain safe and well.

Dear Ramadhan,

I knew that this year would be different, being pregnant during the holy month was always going to be challenging, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was looking forward to being with friends and family, spending time in the community surrounded by laughter, love and friendship. And feeling and seeing your beautiful presence in every smile. This year we will be confined to our homes, some of us alone. We will have to adapt and find peace and contentment in the things we may have taken for granted in the past; like our very existence.

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Throwback to last year just before Ramadhan where I had the most amazing collaboration with fellow artist Shayna Karim [IG@ zay_aan_]
Another collaboration with a great friend just before Ramadhan, doing what we both love, fashion & art! [IG@ regalitylifeandstyle]

Dear Ramadhan,

There is so much that I am grateful for. So many blessings received though I feel unworthy. I am blessed to be able to see you again. There are many who you would have seen last year who are not with us this year. We miss them tremendously. We pray that in you, they would have found mercy, forgiveness and that their final destination is a place of peace and tranquility with their Lord. Ameen

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I will definitely miss going to the mosque for the breaking of fast every day with family, but we plan to make the most of it at home.

Dear Ramadhan.

This year, rather than laughter, company and the busy nature of our daily Ramadhan rituals, we will be forced to listen to the drum of our own hearts. This is an opportunity to be fully present with you, without all of the frills that at times are a distraction. We will have a unique, perhaps once-in-a-lifetime moment to delve deeply into ourselves, in an effort to heal, soothe, repair, replenish, rebuild and create new meaning for our lives. So that when you leave, our “old” world will truly come to an end… but by our choosing.

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September 2018 on the banks of the Wissahickon River, Philadelphia. Sometimes the answers you seek, you can find within… if you are still enough.

Join me at “The Inside Ramadhan” on Instagram @inside_ramadhan where we can share our Ramadhan 2020 preparations and experiences during this time of uncertainty. Send me your stories and pictures via direct message to share on the page.

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“The month of Ramadhan [is that] in which was revealed the Qur’an, a guidance for the people and clear proofs of guidance and criterion. So whoever sights [the new moon of] the month, let him fast it; and whoever is ill or on a journey – then an equal number of other days. Allah intends for you ease and does not intend for you hardship and [wants] for you to complete the period and to glorify Allah for that [to] which He has guided you; and perhaps you will be grateful.” 

Qur’an 2:185

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